Alright, my second email!

posted February 17, 2003 by Josh

Josh

Hola all you pesky dirt sniffing motherfuckers! Wow it sure has been a little bit since I have done anything, so now without further notice.... TA to the fucking DAAA! My second email:



Hey josh long time no rant!!! Just (turtle) stoping by to (hamster) say hello. Sorry if I say (cheeze goblin) wierd things but I'm sorta, okay, totaly insane. (lama.) Just kidding. Actualy I'm going to enter colledge soon and get my early childhood education credential. The damage I can do with thousands of obident children at my command. he he he suckers......
Anyways.........
May your nitro always be explosive.
Mase..
 

....Um well ok. The only thing I can say to that is people try so hard to speak the language of "FUNNY" to me without being properly taught how. Now, us here at SPLURD thrive from the fact that we are all crazy and funny at the same time. I mean granted, each of us would like to take over this planet with an army, but for god's sake, no children! They're too soft and spongy. You need midgets—or the more PC term—little people. For starters, they are always angry for being "not normal" (whatever the hell that is) so the grudge is held tight against us—the NORMS—so they would suffice as better soldiers of doom.

Second point, and this goes back to being funny: well, Mase, you are trying too hard and for the love of fuck don't put subliminal messages into a typed statement, it just never works that way. Oh, and incase you don't get my drift, here is a phrase in bold that will help.
YOU ARE NOT FUCKING FUNNY SO STOP WHAT YOU THINK YOU ARE DOING AND GO BACK TO KEEPING THE BK AT THE FAIR OAKS MALL CLEAN!!! OK!!! HUH!!!! YOU WANT SOME!!!

So if you want to be ripped like this person please feel free to email your possible biological father... BIG JOSH!!

This is to Jer... I need a new Fucking Face I smile so much for my add post people will think I lack a central nervous system. So there.